As Though We Know

“Do not act as if you were going to live ten thousand years. Death hangs over you. While you live, while it is in your power, be good.”-Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, 4.17

We all know we’re not going to live forever, and yet if we watched the way most of us live, you’d think we had somehow negotiated an extension. We put off the conversation we know we need to have. We tell ourselves we’ll get serious about our health tomorrow, spend more time with our kids when work settles down, and call our parents next weekend. The thing we’ve been talking about for years can start when the timing is better. The irony is that we don’t actually believe we have ten thousand years, but we behave as though we do.

Marcus doesn’t say do everything now, though. He says “while it is in your power, be good,” which is a very different instruction. It’s not about panicking because time is limited so much as not wasting the time that’s still ours. Nor is it about cramming everything into our lives, quitting our jobs tomorrow, or living every day in a frenzy like it’s our last. We only have to recognize that some things are within our power today that may not be tomorrow.

In most areas of my life I’ve gotten better at this. I don’t sit on my health anymore and I don’t let resentments simmer for months, but there’s still one thing I catch myself saying “later” about, and that’s travel, seeing more of the world. I keep telling myself there’ll be a better window for it, when things are less busy, when there’s more money saved, when the kids are older, whatever the excuse happens to be that week. That’s exactly the kind of thinking Marcus is talking about. I’m not out of time. I just keep acting like the time is guaranteed.

We can call someone today, apologize, start taking care of our bodies, tell somebody we love them, stop carrying a resentment, and book the trip. We can begin something today, and maybe most importantly, we can stop waiting for some imaginary version of our lives where everything finally lines up perfectly.

Maybe the question isn’t how much time we have left. None of us knows that anyway.

The better question is, what are we putting off as though we know how much time we have?

#MotivationMonday